To my Mormon Brothers, Let’s talk about your same-sex attraction and your theology of marriage.
A couple of years ago I took an EMT course and became friends with someone that grew up Mormon. I remember when I walked into the class, heard the instructor say we needed to find a study partner, I looked around and saw a good-looking guy there and told myself, “I want to be study partners with that guy.”
He eventually moved in with me and my Biola buddies and we had hours upon hours discussing the differences between Mormonism and what I will call Traditional Christianity. There was a very interesting observation I saw with my buddy who was Mormon, he starting reading Christian Trinitarian authors' books about marriage and was thrilled to find out we don’t believe a Christian needs to be married to enter into Heaven to live with Jesus and the Father, and I will add, The Holy Spirit.
4 years later, we are still friends.
I got to learn from him about Mormonism and he got to learn from me about how we nonmormons see Jesus Christ and Marriage.
At the end of the day, Mormons see Jesus differently than how historical Christianity says he should be seen.
But I’m not going to get into that.
And I want to apologize for how Christians, especially evangelicals, have treated you guys. My evangelical family is very passionate, but also very arrogant in their portrayal of how they see the truth about doctrines. We do have fundamental differences, but those differences should be communicated with much more grace and time with each other.
Sorry for being rude to you guys and acting like jerks.
Please forgive us.
What I want to address and what I am very passionate about is the fact that many members of the LDS Church struggle with homosexuality.
And your Theology of marriage is hurting them.
It is forcing them to enter into marriage covenants for the sake of entering into the highest Heaven.
Of what I know, the Celestial Kingdom is the highest of the three kingdoms of heaven in Mormon Doctrine. The other two kingdoms are the Terrestrial and Telestial. In the Celestial Kingdom, the righteous will live with God and Jesus Christ.
In the Celestial Kingdom, the glory a Mormon receives is broken down into three levels. In order to attain the highest degree of glory, there are many requirements.
1. A Mormon must have a testimony of Jesus Christ.
2. Be baptized by a person with the proper priesthood authority.
3. Keep the commandments.
4. Receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.
5. Overcome temptation and worldly things through faith.
6. Become perfected through the atonement of Christ.
But the most important one, which is what I want to address, is this belief,
If a person wants to receive the highest glory in the Celestial Kingdom, that person needs to be in an eternal marriage.
The Doctrine of the Covenants explains that marriage is the highest order of the priesthood and that eternal marriage is also referred to as New and Everlasting Covenant of Marriage. Families live together in the highest degree of glory in the Celestial Heaven.
And I have a pickle with this belief!
and I am talking to the Mormon Church leaders here.
Well, part of the Christian tradition, which you guys say you are a part of, says that you don’t have to be married.
Jesus says when we live with him in paradise we will be like the angels in Heaven who are not married.
The apostle Paul also spoke about this and encouraged his Church members to not be married so they can do more for the sake of the Gospel of Jesus.
And so to the LDS Church leaders, why are you teaching something that goes against the teaching of Jesus and the Apostles?
And do you not see that your LDS members who are attracted to the same sex are going to have a hard time getting married because they don’t always relate to the heteronormative standards that Mormonism places on its members?
This is really hard stuff.
How would it feel if you felt pressured to marry someone of the same sex because your community says that needs to happen to be valued and to enter into the highest of Heaven's glory?
That would suck, wouldn't it?
Mormons who struggle with homosexuality and your singles have a lot of pressure on them to enter into a relationship that might not work out for them. That actually might be unhealthy for them.
They may need their human relational needs met in a different way than what Joseph Smith and your Church leaders teach.
I have quite a few Mormon Followers following the 4TS and the Church, not because of my Trinitarian beliefs, but because they are trying to figure out how to experience godly, holy, same-sex intimacy outside the behemoth in your religion called Marriage and want to experience healthy platonic intimacy in friendship.
Friendship is also eternal. Jesus and his apostles taught that it was eternal.
You see, The LDS Church has also made marriage an idol just like my evangelical friends have done.
Although my evangelical friends don’t believe marriage is eternal, they sure do act like it is.
And this is what you guys have in common, the evangelical church and the Mormon Church is so focused on marriage that it forgot to take care of its members that struggle with homosexuality.
It forgets to meet the needs of those that Jesus calls his own.
It forgets to meet the needs of those that are baptized in his name.
It forgets to meet the needs of those that are pursuing righteousness and holiness.
It forgets to meet the needs of those that have received the Gift of the Holy Spirit.
It forgets to walk alongside those that really want to follow Jesus.
I think the fact the Mormon Church is what basically paid for Prop 8 to be one of the most debated laws in the U.S. shows that it cares more about the definition of marriage in a political sense and doesn’t care about the laws of Jesus regarding loving those within his church.
Many Evangelical Christians and Mormons who struggle with homosexuality leave our churches to get these deep platonic needs met because our churches are not offering to them the relational needs they need to be a human.
The 4TS is one way to meet their needs.
Please, start talking about how you can give your Mormon brothers and sisters touch. Healthy platonic intimate touch. Touch goes a long way for every human. Sex isn't the only way to experience loving accepting touch.
Please, start talking about how you spend your time with your Church members. If they are valuable to Christ, then they should be valuable to you! Jesus once said, “His brothers and sisters are those that do the Father’s will.”
Please, start talking about healthy ways of transparency and vulnerability. Talk about the body, what does it mean to be attracted to the same sex and what does it mean to lust after the same sex. How can you guys be more emotionally connected with each other in friendships? A transparent connection is very important to someone who struggles with homosexuality.
and lastly, be the CHURCH! Establish Teamwork. Start inviting your singles in your Church over for dinners and family vacations. If you believe that family will be eternal, then there is no reason why you can’t spend some earthly time with those that are single or struggle with homosexuality. You have eternity to be with your family, at least help your members who may feel lonely by including them into your circle of love that God has given you. Value Church community over family. I am not saying that family isn’t important, but what I am challenging is the priority of a follower of Jesus. The Church and its members are just as important as your immediate family.
Jesus wanted his Church to be the relationship that his followers would get their needs met,
Why? because it is through his Church that he actively works on earth.
So, to the LDS Leaders, you have members that struggle with homosexuality. Start talking about it. Start asking God to show you how to love those that struggle with this in real practical ways. Don’t assume marriage will solve all the issues and help you guys not have to deal with this.
Sometimes I feel like my evangelical family does that to me.
Don’t be like them.
Follow Jesus, he is your savior, teacher, and God.
Why not teach what he taught?
"Love your neighbors as you love yourself."